Age 4: I tell my mom I want to quit pre-school because all they teach is the alphabet, and I already know how to read.
Age 5: I watch my kindergarten teacher pull out my friend's loose tooth by tying floss around it, attaching the floss to the closet door, and closing the door.
Age 6: I am one of the tallest girls in grade 1. My teacher puts me in the fast learners reading group. These are unrelated issues.
Age 7: My brother and I convince my parents to get season passes to Expo 86. We proceed to go as often as possible. I remember the giant Swatch.
Age 8: I am taking piano lessons with my very scary teacher. She yells. Many times, I hold back tears until the end of the lesson.
Age 9: I am in a split class with a new teacher. I still spell better than all the kids in the class, including in the grade above me.
Age 10: I put a poppy, pin side up, on the seat of a boy I hate. He sits on it, but the pin lodges between the "cheeks". I laugh - he doesn't.
Age 11: We move to a new house. My brother gets the room with the big windowsill, so I get to choose what side of the bathroom I want. It is not the same.
Age 12: I practice piano for 3 hours a day to get ready for my grade 10 piano exam. Sometimes, I read a book while practicing my scales, thinking my mom won't notice. She notices.
Age 13: Transition to grade 8 and a school where I know no one. I look around at all the nerds in my enriched classes and fear that I am more of a nerd than any of them.
Age 14: My team wins at Technolympics and is rewarded with the ugliest long-sleeve t-shirts I've ever seen. That's what you get for building the best 10-second timer and the longest, thinnest newspaper bridge.