Growing up

Lately I've been thinking about adulthood and how I don't really feel like an adult. I have friends who have purchased a place of their own, I have other friends who are moving out or who have already moved out to live on their own... and as for my situation - someone said to me the other day that I was so lucky to marry someone who had already paid off his house. (Not true! The bank still demands money from us!) So apparently at least one person in my life thinks that I fell into this delightful situation of home ownership by some combination of luck and good looks. (I added that part.)

I'm definitely lucky. Hubs bought this house without my input or initial financial contribution (I don't even think I was in town at the time.) He did the renovations, painted the whole house, carpeted and laid tile, and all I did was belittle the (former) shag carpeting and move my darn self in the day we got married. Oh, and then I complained about the lack of closet space. I'm so helpful.

This "luck", however, comes with feeling a little behind in life... aside from nosing around at some open houses, I've never actually had to look for a place to rent or buy. I've never had to apply for a mortgage. I've "rented" before (in the Hat) but I hardly call that living on my own. I've never even purchased a car. If we choose to rebuild one day, I might never get to actually hire an agent and go through the buying process. This isn't intended to be a whine - I am super grateful to God for everything I have. I sometimes just wish I had gone through the process of getting to where we are, rather than being on the outside watching. Sort of ridiculous to think this way, I know. I'm just musing.

Anyway.

Today we signed the dog up for puppy daycare. I am heading for a very busy couple of months at work, and it will help tremendously to have somewhere for her to go on the days that she can't come with me to work. Also it helps tremendously that I found a place that is significantly cheaper than the other spots at which I inquired. It's just pennies a day! Many many pennies! But far less pennies than the other place. Actually it is half the price compared to the place near my work, but then again this daycare won't take her for off-leash runs through the mountains. Oh well, she's too young for off-leash running in any event.

I just received some sad news about someone I was acquainted with. He died in an accident leaving behind a wife and kids. Life is so incredibly short. I can't even begin to imagine what the family is going through. Keep them in your prayers.

Doggy Daycare

Sometimes I think my dog needs a more adventurous day. Should her day really be made up mostly of sleeping? I mean, she is a puppy, so she needs sleep but wow! she's always yawning! Except while eating or thinking of food :)

I was thinking of signing her up for a doggy daycare near my work on a once-per-week basis. That way she would have at least one day where she'd get to interact with other dogs, go on runs through the mountains, etc. Seems like a neat idea, right? Unfortunately, it's pretty expensive to have a dog in daycare. It isn't a lot cheaper than human daycare! So I think it'll have to wait for now. Too bad - she would enjoy running off-leash, I'm sure. I might actually put her in daycare for next month when I'm in trial. Ugh. I'm exhausted even thinking about it.

On to other things. I'm happy to report that even though I am a bit of a stickler for things at work, I do not suffer from the "kitchen OCD" that some of my friends have. My mom is definitely one of these, she can't sit down to eat until the entire kitchen is clean. I'm not a complete slob, but I do think dishes can wait until after dinner. Of course, I also don't cook, so who am I to say anything! I will say that since the dog's arrival, we have learned to keep the floors clean, since she chews everything. I think that's a step in the right direction. Housework just feels SO low priority to me :) But don't worry! I always get it clean - it just takes a while to motivate myself.

I need SUNSHINE. now!!

Holidaying

On the radio yesterday, there was a news preview clip asking, "Are you ready for the long weekend? Oh wait - unlike most Canadians, you don't get one!" Then various people talked about how disappointed they are that Albertans get Family Day (a stat in Feb) but we get no stats until Easter. Blah blah blah such a long haul between January 1 and Easter. Blah blah we need stats to keep us going. Someone actually said, "Working families need a break." Sucks to you if you are a working single, I guess!

Of course, what they don't mention or realize is that most people in Alberta don't get Family Day AND Heritage Day (the first Monday of August.) They just get Family Day. Even when I worked for the feds in AB, we had to choose between Family Day or Heritage Day.

Frankly, the "We need a stat in winter" whining bothers me. I much prefer having a statutory holiday in August when the weather is likely to be awesome, rather than in February when it's either raining or snowing or cloudy and about to rain or snow. In August, you can enjoy the beauty of Vancouver and its surrounding areas. In February, you could... go skiing maybe... but then you have to watch out for highway closures due to accidents and snow. Depressing.

I can't wait until the summer statutory holidays, actually. Canada Day is always a good one because it's right around our anniversary. I need some sunshine! We might be off to Mexico again this summer. It can't come too soon in my opinion!!

Misbehaving

Kodi is getting much, much bigger... she's probably reaching 25 pounds now!

Here are some of her interesting and funny quirks:
- she thinks everything in the kitchen is hers and that all food is being prepared for her
- she does a good "dance"
- she will put herself to bed when tired
- this morning I found her sitting in our laundry basket (on top of the clean clothes)
- if she chews something you don't want her to chew, you just have to show it to her and say NO and she'll never touch it again.
- at work, she sleeps at my feet instead of on the dog bed
- she will eat every single treat or kibble with the same vigour... although at least it takes her more than 5 seconds to eat her meals now!
- sometimes, she'll be really curious about the dogs on TV and will approach the TV to see where the dogs are
- she naps for hours at a time
- she knows when she is in trouble and will try to avoid our gaze when she has been bad

And here are some of her more irritating quirks:
- when she is tired, she acts like a spoiled, cranky toddler - she puts everything in her mouth and runs away when told to come
- she constantly pulls on her leash instead of walking nicely, even though she is choking herself by pulling
- she is an early riser... obviously she does not take after her parents
- she thinks all food and everything with a crinkly wrapper is for her - despite never having received food from our table, she'll always try to give the puppy eyes for food
- she has to greet every single person who is within one block's radius when on a walk

I can't believe how fast she is growing - soon my puppy will be a big, big dog with a big wagging tail. Well, maybe she'll calm down a little by that point. And then I will get a second puppy! Just kidding.

The Joy of Parenting

Being a parent to a dog is, I think, a lot more fun than being a real parent.

Of course, I wouldn't know.

But anyway. This morning I was very upset. The dog woke up to pee as usual around 6:30 and I looked outside before letting her out - it was dark. I turned on the light, opened the door, and she ran outside. As she was peeing I saw what I thought was a cat run out towards her from behind our shed - but it turned out to be a giant raccoon. Thankfully, it only took a few steps towards the dog, and even better, the dog came back in when I called her. It was a scary moment. I hate raccoons.... the ones that live around here are constantly tipping over our garbage cans and rummaging through the crap. (Not literally crap.) Maybe if they learned to put the cans back up and the lids on, I'd be less disgusted by them.

Do you ever wonder why God created certain animals? I wonder this about mosquitoes, rodents of most kinds, raccoons (are those rodents?), wasps, silverfish (so gross!)...

Anyway. PJ requested a post about the Canucks. I've decided not to post about the Canucks at all, however. We'll see what happens when it comes to the post-season... if we are in it at all!

The dog is over 20 pounds now. I hope she isn't growing too fast... she doesn't look fat, so maybe she's just piling on the muscle. Next to other church dogs, she is a giant.... but in puppy school, she's still just a midget and she freaks out when other dogs try to play with her a little roughly. She doesn't seem to mind the rough play with smaller dogs. Maybe she's just a bully!

Unsolicited

Outside pet store. Dog is trying to leap off a curb toward our car. We stop her and ask her to sit. She is tired and hasn't even had lunch yet, so is reluctant to sit. We say SIT and she finally sits.

Random lady walks by and says "Don't forget to praise them when they do what you say or else they won't do it next time."

Oh okay thanks lady. Because I've done ZERO research on dogs and dog training. And also, because we asked for your assistance. Move on with your day.

Moderation

I've decided to be a comment moderator. Don't let this stop you from commenting, unless you are the type to leave stupid comments (like the one I deleted), in which case, quit it. I try to have a sense of humour (and I would hope this shows through in my posts sometimes) but on occasion, I just don't find things very funny.

If you'd like to leave unfunny comments on my blog, you're welcome to say them to my face instead.

The dog's typical day at Mommy's work

First off let me just say that I wanted the dog to learn our real names rather than "mommy" and "daddy", however, I re-thunk that when I realized that if we have kids, our kids wouldn't be taught to call us by our real names. Thus - mommy and daddy it is.

Here is a typical day for the dog when she is my office dog.

7-7:30am - wake up and demand food. Unreasonable amount of whining while food is being prepared. Pretend food has been withheld for years. Freak out when food is presented. Inhale food at ridiculous pace.
8-9am - ride in car. Whine and bark at mommy during car ride.
9ish - arrive at work. Run around in parking lot. Pee near tree or mommy's boss' car.
9-10ish - first nap. If lucky, nap for over 1.5 hrs. Thrash around in sleep, growl/bark during dreams.
11am - go outside for a walk.. Pee. Poop in random spot. Show little appreciation when mommy picks it up.
11:30ish - Fuss. Thrash around with toys. Get bored, whine, growl. Chew on chairs, papers, cardboard, metal, plastic. Lick floor. Hear "NO" about a thousand times.
11:30-12:30 - refuse to settle down. Fuss. Chew everything. Pretend to sleep, then fuss again.
12:30 - demand food. Again more whining and barking despite mommy's SHUSH. Jump on mommy despite OFF and NO. Sit when commanded to for food, but look unhappy. Eat at super fast pace. Return to bowl and discover that no food appears after the meal is finished.
1ish - second nap.
2:00 - wake up, go out, pee. Eat sticks and leaves. Investigate every fallen leaf. Eat several. Spit them up in mommy's office later. Go for walk around office.
2ish-3ish - more fussing. Feign interest in Christmas toys. Fight off sleep despite constant yawns. Growl at toys. Growl at mommy. Bark. Hear NO repeatedly. Decline to chew on Nylabone in favour of chewing on anything else.
3:00-4:00 - third nap.
4ish - wake up, go out, pee, poop, smell everything, eat sticks, pull on leash when told not to, cry when told not to pull on leash.
4-5ish - fourth nap.
5ish - fuss when put in crate, whine all the way home, bark at mommy when she does not provide treats in the car immediately upon demand.

Dogs... gotta love em.

Heard on TV

[Lady and her kid are making egg-free, "healthy" cupcakes on the Martha Stewart show. (Aside: if a cupcake is healthy, is there a point to eating it??)]

[Lady adds water and vegetable oil to the Kitchenaid mixer, narrating as she goes along.]

Lady: So you add 1 and a quarter cup water and 1 cup of vegetable oil.
Martha: What kind of vegetable oil do you use?
Lady: It's vegetable oil. You know, vegetable oil.
Martha: Oh.

I suppose it's one step above saying "EVOO" like Rachael Ray, but come on, can't you at least make it up if you don't know what kind it is? Say CANOLA. Everyone loves canola.

Move-out Must-haves

Sometimes it's hard to believe that it has been over 2.5 years since I've lived at home. Time flies. I thought I'd compile a little list of must have items for those who are moving out... things I didn't really realize I'd need, or took completely for granted at home!

1. A sewing kit. I don't really know how to sew, but I still had to buy a few things in order to put buttons back on, etc. What I've got: some sort of plastic box, some needles, a few spools of thread, a pincushion, and some scissors. Also I keep all the buttons from new clothes in those tiny ziploc bags, but I put a note inside so I know which shirt came with which button. Smart eh?
   
2. Stamps. At home there were just always stamps and I never had to buy any! What I've got: again a plastic box to hold the stamps - and a Shoppers nearby from which to buy stamps.
3. Toilet brush. It sounds obvious, I know. What I've got: dollar store quality toilet brush. No one got me the $20 one I registered for!
4. Vacuum. We had a central vacuum at home, but this house is too old for one, too bad. Also, did you know that floors don't clean themselves? What a disappointment! What I've got: Eureka vacuum from Costco. It isn't even sold any more. I wanted a Dyson or Miele or even a Kenmore, but couldn't justify the $400-600 price tag. Tip: buy a ton of vacuum bags, some filters, etc, all at once so you don't run the risk of having them discontinued later!
   
5. Candles and a lighter or matches, and a flashlight. You never know when the power is going to go out. What I've got: Well, aside from the zillions of wedding candles we had left over, I also have a few random Ikea candles... and we have two handcrank flashlights. Not the best, but they do the job.
   
6. Mesh laundry bags. You don't want your delicates to be twisted around in the machine! What I've got: a lovely "football" shaped bag from Daiso! $2!
7. Dish towels. I use sponges to wash dishes, so only need towels for hand-drying, dish-drying, and wiping up stuff. What I've got: Since my hubby just grabs the first towel he can find to wipe up a spill, I buy the super cheap facecloths from Ikea (12 for $5.99) and bleach them when they aren't very white any more.
   
8. Shelving and storage options. I am constantly in need of places to put things... especially now that the dog is here, and wants to chew on everything! Also (see next item), I always have extras of household stuff. What I've got: Sorely lacking in this regard - I need to get some chew-proof rubbermaids and boxes.
   
9. Costco membership. Ok, this isn't a must-have. But it's awesome! Why wouldn't you want to buy 96 loads worth of laundry detergent? or 250 bounce sheets? or 30 rolls of TP? or 8 tubes of toothpaste? or camping stuff in the middle of February? What I've got: We used to get a membership for free, but now we suck it up and pay for it ourselves. It's more for entertainment than anything else - I could spend a whole day at Costco!
10. Tool kit. The one time you'll need tools is when you don't have any at home. What I've got: Actually, I am blissfully unaware of what tools we have beyond a hammer and multi-bit screwdriver but I have been assured that all the tools we have are necessary. I'm sure the hubby could tell you what other tools we have, but I mostly just holler "Help! Please fix _____" and somehow, he gets it done. Maybe it isn't the tool kid we all need, but just someone who will fix things!

That is all I can think of for now...

One week old

Kodi's been with us for one week now. This week she has peed on the carpet about 6 times (oops!) at home and 3 times at work (double oops.) Good thing we have a good stain remover. She has actually been quite good about giving us warning when she has to pee... but sometimes she gets outside and is far more interested in eating every leaf and twig in sight. You'd think we don't feed her or something. She has come to work with me three times and seems comfortable there, although really, she spends 75% of the time sleeping. I suppose it's a puppy thing - energy in spurts.

I wonder what goes through a puppy's mind.... does she remember the home she came from? Does she miss her brothers and sisters? Who does she think we are - food providers? pseudo-parents? I dunno.

Enough about the dog, she's sleeping right now anyway. I am watching some sort of makeover show on an Asian girl and the hairdresser said about her hair: "There's so much of it... and the colour is just so solid and one colour... I want to change it." Um... yes. Imagine! Asian hair that is all black! Ridiculous!

Ok. Real time blogging. Head & Shoulders commercial about total softness AND no dandruff. That girl is about to put her hair in a ponytail with a scrunchie. Do people even use those any more? It isn't the 1990's! Elations - some sort of vitamin drink for joints. Oh - it's a Priceline commercial. I think - yes! that's William Shatner. He's so delightfully cheesy. Now, an ad for LA Ink. I've never gotten hooked on these tattoo shows - it seems there are just tons of them.

Back to the show! Hello "before" frumpy Asian girl! Hello much hipper looking younger sister! Now, the reveal. Wow! It's a nicer haircut but I think she actually looks .... ten years older!! In a more sophisticated way. But she looks like my piano teacher and I admit I'm a little scared by that. She has a total mom haircut. Before, she just looked frumpy and tired - now she looks like a well-dressed see lai. There is no way she's only 28. The show was supposed to make her look ten years younger! But alas... no luck. Maybe I'm just being harsh cuz I don't think I look as old as she does, and I never even got a makeover. Hmm - maybe it's the dark red lipstick. Well, remind me never to get my hair cut like that. Ahaha! They didn't even succeed - people still thought she was an average age of 31. Sucks.

Hooray! It's time for What Not to Wear. Yay!

Show me that smile again

I wanted a dog for a very long time. I went back and forth for months. A dog is just like a child in many senses, right... - they have many needs, they need people around, and they don't know when to stop being bad sometimes... and worst of all, you have to actually pick up the poo WITH YOUR HANDS. But on the other hand, they are loyal and no matter how many times you catch them doing something bad, they still love you....

So, this dog ownership thing has been very interesting. Kodi is a great little dog (soon to be not so little.) She is a typical puppy - full of energy one minute, needing a nap the second. Obviously I'm biased but I think she's super smart - she knows how to sit and shake hands and almost has the hang of lying down on command too. And she's only 11 weeks old! She also has been pretty good about telling us when she has to go to the bathroom. I'm thinking of how to hook up a bell so she can ring it when she needs to go out. Haha!

Definitely there have been frustrations - like when she is bored and begins to growl and/or bark at me, or when she tries to chew every piece of paper in my office. Hubs told me to stand up, make myself look way bigger than her (how hard could that be? she's a puppy!) and say "NO" at the top of my lungs. Let's just say - we're working on it. I was a little upset on Monday after having a frustrating day with her ... but I'm trying to remember that she's just a puppy, and prone to doing the wrong thing sometimes.

I'll have to take a video of her tearing apart her monkey toy sometime. It's one of the only non-Christmas toys we got her. Poor monkey lost half his mouth already!

Sigh.

Random tidbits of advice

1. If you are headed out of town and need a cheap hotel (in price, but not in quality) - use Priceline to name your own price. I got a hotel in Orlando for $55 when similar hotels would have been over $150.
   
2. Static cling got you all fired up? Rub a Bounce sheet on your clothing!
3. If you are unhappy with your Starbucks drink, write to them. You'll always get a response and some sort of free drink as compensation. (Note: I don't just write for the heck of it. I'm not that cheap.)
4. Craigslist is your friend. From video games to furniture to jobs - what CAN'T you find on Craigslist? (It's rhetorical. I know you want to answer. I am looking at you, big brother.)

PS: Look! I added a blog on the right hand side... :)

I took this picture while parasailing in Mexico. We were convinced to go along with one of the kids on the trip and although it was pricey, it was definitely fun. If you haven't gone parasailing, here is what happens: you get strapped into a harness while wearing a lifejacket, and you stand at the back of a speedboat. As the boat speeds up, one of the crew lets out your line and you start to float higher and higher until you feel like you're at the top of a skyscraper. All the while, the parachute is allowing you to float above the water while billowing out behind you. It isn't a long trip (or it would be even pricier!) but the view and the thrill are well worth it.

Anyway, I took a ton of pictures and tried to get in about half of them, thus ensuring that I look like a total parasailing dork. Nonetheless. This picture is my favourite. I love how the light filters through the parachute, bright but not blinding. If you looked from a different angle, you might only see sunlight. For some reason, looking at the sunlight through the holes in the chute reminds me of how I see God sometimes ... getting only a glimpse of him, without seeing the whole picture. Maybe sometimes I put my own parachute up, choosing not to see what I know well is there... because if you can't see God, surely he can't see you... choosing to float along, the-devil-may-care attitude... thinking that I am doing well to hold myself up... deciding to hide from God and thus hide all of my faults and sins and challenging times.

Well. No one can hide from God, not Adam, not Eve, not Jonah, not me.

Do you ever feel like hiding from God? Or from other people? I'm learning to lean on God as my anchor, my rock, my salvation. Despite being a Christian for over 20 years - it isn't easy.

2007 Meme

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?

I took a flight from the International terminal for the first time ever. It's much nicer than the domestic side.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I had to review my January 2007 blogs to see what I had said, and apparently I had resolved to save all of my loonies and toonies. I can't say I saved ALL of my loonies and toonies, but we do have a substantial collection going. Maybe I'll make it back to Disney World after all.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Quite a few friends and one cousin. I haven't even met my cousin's new baby!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Um... well... the hubby's family dog died and it was so, so sad :(

5. What countries did you visit?

Chile, Mexico, and the US of A.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

I don't think I lacked anything in 2007! But if I could choose to have something, it would be a TRIP TO DISNEY WORLD.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Ummm.... I'm going to go with "none"...

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

WINNING. Ask me more later.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I don't really fail at things. :D Just kidding. I certainly wasn't as good a housekeeper as I wanted to be, so maybe that counts.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

I did lose my voice recently...

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I would say my computer, although I did not actually receive it in 2007.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

This is a weird question.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I wasn't depressed, but I was definitely appalled back in December...

14. Where did most of your money go?

Well, we did buy a new car this year, so that is sucking up some cash. But luckily it's a hybrid! Otherwise ... well... we got a Wii and I got a new computer too!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

I am never *that* excited. But I was pretty thrilled to get the new car!

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

I don't really have a 2007 song, but I really like this song I hear all the time - it's called East to West by Casting Crowns. Here's the chorus:

Jesus, can You show me just how far the East is from the West?
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of Your mercy I find rest
Cause You know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? happier, I would say, because life just keeps getting more joyful! b) thinner or fatter? Possibly the same, or a little fatter. Dang it. c) richer or poorer? richer - but not by much.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

I am not really one for regrets. I wish I had kept in better contact with out-of-town friends though.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Played a few less video games! My poor eyes :)

20. How did you spend Christmas?

Slept in ... and then had dinner at my mom's house with the in-laws. It was nice.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?

I did not fall OUT of love, does that count?

22. What was your favorite TV program?

I would have to say 24, although Heroes was a close second.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Contrary to what you might believe, I don't really hate people. I just harbour extreme dislike sometimes!

24. What was the best book you read?

The best book... hmm... well, the last Harry Potter book came out and it was pretty darn fantastic. Other than that, I don't really remember the books I read this year. Perhaps they were just not that good!

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Really, I hardly ever listen to music, I don't have many CD's and I just listen in my car. But maybe the greatest discoveries were Paul Brandt and Aaron Lines - after meeting them in Chile, we started to listen to their music and they are both awesome. Country music!!

26. What did you want and get?

I wanted a new computer, I got a new computer. I wanted a Wii, I got a Wii (after an overnight campout at Zellers! What was I thinking!) I wanted black flats, I bought black flats (3 pairs! Overkill maybe.)

27. What did you want and not get?

I cannot even think of what I wanted and didn't get... maybe I have low expectations. Or else a lot of stuff. Oh! I know - I wanted a clean house! And I did not get one! Haha!

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

I can't even remember the last time we went to a theatre to watch a movie... so let's see, DVD-wise, I think my favourite film was Jesus Camp. I just found it so incredibly fascinating, like a train wreck, couldn't turn my eyes away. Very eye-opening.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Embarrassingly, I couldn't actually remember without looking back at my blog. But anyway! We went to a playoff game the night before my birthday and seven periods later, the Canucks won and it was my birthday :) We didn't get to the Keg for my post-game, birthday dinner since it was past 1 AM and whaddaya know, the Keg isn't open that late. Oh well.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I really don't know how to answer this... I can't say that I lacked anything.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Cheap = good.

But I'm trying to change that to Work appropriate = good.

32. What kept you sane?

My job ... sort of.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I do not fancy celebrities.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

Difficult question. I'll have to think about this.

35. Who did you miss?

My brother who moved to the States!

36. Who was the best new person you met?

I can't think of this right now but I could tell you stories about the worst person I met...

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.

More of a continual lesson - I have learned that when I put God first, he and I seem to walk closer, and God's provisions for me seem so much richer.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

His grace still amazes me.

Auld Lang Syne

Ushering in the new year ... do you feel prepared?

Rarely do I make resolutions - why bother setting the standards high when I know I won't keep them - but this year I think I will definitely strive to be a little more patient, and a little less talkative. Pretty challenging not to talk, I always have a lot to say. But today someone told me that someone else told her (follow along, please) that I seemed to turn the conversation onto myself a lot. This caught me off guard, given that I had always thought the "someone else" did the exact same thing when we conversed. In fact I recall the specific conversation, and I recall the "someone else" asking me about my life, so why she would find it weird that I talked about myself, I just don't know.

But then again, the truth usually lies somewhere in between two people's perceptions.

I'm full of flaws, and often I can't stop thinking about those flaws. You might not know that about me. I don't like to show weakness. So of course, I am now mulling (ok, ruminating) over the fact (or perception) that someone thinks I talk about myself far too much.

Sometimes, I sort of hate who I am. So it's a good thing God's love for me is unconditional, and exists even when I'm tired of myself.

I'm tired of myself right now.

*EDIT... to respond to comments:

PJ: I think you've missed my point entirely. I never said that I like to talk about myself. Certainly, this blog is about me, it is my blog after all.

All I meant to say in this blog is that I have never thought I talked a lot about myself to that friend, but if that friend perceives that I did, maybe I will just have to keep a lot more TO myself in the future. That's all.

Pondering the future

The hubby's extended family appears to be turning into Wii addicts. Tonight we enjoyed yet another family dinner. People have moved on from asking when we are going to have kids to asking when we are going to build our new house. Do not panic - we have no concrete plans to build a house. Do not ask me - we are not even going to consider it for a few more years. I have no idea where everyone decided we were going to build a house forthwith, but all sorts of (unsolicited? unhelpful?) advice came pouring in - such as, build now before you have kids! build it bigger so you have lots of room! build now because it will be expensive later!

I'm quite happy living where we are right now. Those close to me will know that it's a struggle just to keep our house clean - imagine living in a bigger house where the amount of surface area to clean would be staggering. I suppose the hubby's family is just excited or something at the idea that we might be expanding our humble abode, but if we had to keep up with the wealth of extended family, we would have to work several jobs each, and I'd probably have to start embezzling. We went to one family's house recently which felt like one of those dream-home-lottery houses ... I just felt uncomfortable the whole time, like I was dirtying the place just by walking through it. I'd rather live here and be proud of the fact that the hubby saved up for years on his own to be able to buy this place. I'd like to be proud when people come over and aren't horrified by what they see. I'd like to be content with what we have.

My personality isn't overly laid back, but I would like to think that I am learning to be content. This is applicable in many circumstances. The hubby is working toward a new career of sorts, and there is always the chance he won't like it, or maybe will like it but will find it very difficult, and money will be tight. Or maybe he'll want to be a stay-at-home dad if we have kids. (I highly doubt I will want to be a stay-at-home mom but I suppose anything is possible.) I would hope that I could learn to be content in any of those situations. In the past couple of years, I have learned that God is faithful and will always provide, if we put him first in our lives.

Two days until Christmas. The Lord is good - let us come and adore.

Timeline

Age 4: I tell my mom I want to quit pre-school because all they teach is the alphabet, and I already know how to read.

Age 5: I watch my kindergarten teacher pull out my friend's loose tooth by tying floss around it, attaching the floss to the closet door, and closing the door.

Age 6: I am one of the tallest girls in grade 1. My teacher puts me in the fast learners reading group. These are unrelated issues.

Age 7: My brother and I convince my parents to get season passes to Expo 86. We proceed to go as often as possible. I remember the giant Swatch.

Age 8: I am taking piano lessons with my very scary teacher. She yells. Many times, I hold back tears until the end of the lesson.

Age 9: I am in a split class with a new teacher. I still spell better than all the kids in the class, including in the grade above me.

Age 10: I put a poppy, pin side up, on the seat of a boy I hate. He sits on it, but the pin lodges between the "cheeks". I laugh - he doesn't.

Age 11: We move to a new house. My brother gets the room with the big windowsill, so I get to choose what side of the bathroom I want. It is not the same.

Age 12: I practice piano for 3 hours a day to get ready for my grade 10 piano exam. Sometimes, I read a book while practicing my scales, thinking my mom won't notice. She notices.

Age 13: Transition to grade 8 and a school where I know no one. I look around at all the nerds in my enriched classes and fear that I am more of a nerd than any of them.

Age 14: My team wins at Technolympics and is rewarded with the ugliest long-sleeve t-shirts I've ever seen. That's what you get for building the best 10-second timer and the longest, thinnest newspaper bridge.

Sleigh bells ring.. .maybe

When we were young, we used to spend most of our Christmases in Seattle with my aunts and their families. I loved Christmas in Seattle - my cousins were so much fun, and being the youngest, I got to take full advantage of the cute factor. Plus, my cousins let me "shop" in their closets, and gave me bags full of barely worn clothes. One of my aunts had a big fish tank in front of their fireplace, and I still remember how my uncle would move the fish tank the night before Christmas while we slept, so that in the morning he could point to it and say, "Look! Santa came and he moved the fish tank!"

I never actually believed in Santa, of course, but it was still amusing. My parents never encouraged a belief in Santa Claus - they taught us that Christmas was about the birth of our Saviour. It's probably safe to say that most "church babies" like me had similar experiences.

So I was a little surprised in the last week to find that Praise 106.5, my number one pre-set station in the car, was playing The Christmas Song (Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire.) It's a lovely song, but a part of it involves kids waiting for Santa and his sleigh full of goodies. I find it strange that a Christian music station would play such a secular song. It seems that Christmas is being watered down even in a Christian radio station. Very.... sad.

Two weeks until Christmas. I'm looking forward to some quality family time. My brother is coming back, yay! Also, we are hoping that the hubby's parents will come with us to Christmas Eve service at church - please pray that God will work in his family. Praise God for his unending love.

Things I would like to have

1. Strawberry Chapstick. I don't know why, but Shoppers (and other stores) only seem to sell plain and cherry, which, yuck. I have only found strawberry at one particular store at UBC (Subcetera). Not being a student anymore has a downside.
2. A saxophone. I still want to learn how to play one day. How hard can it be?? :)
3. New computer.... although the rattling in this one seems to have stopped... yay!
4. 24 Season 6 set. Gotta keep the collection going.
5. A 16-20 oz. stainless steel tumbler, no handle. I have a "tall" size one already. What? I like hot drinks.

Exhaustion

It's only been 3 days and I am TIRED. Also, it is terribly warm in robes. I don't like the on-edge feeling I have all the time, and while it's fun and all, it's just so, so hard. It doesn't help that I am still fighting a cold. I delivered my opening statement with about half my normal voice and now I am hacking up a lung. But God is good and I know it's only by his grace that I even had any voice!

Okay. What else can I talk about. How about some real-time blogging of TV:

It's commercial time during America's Next Top Model. Yum, chocolate torte or something like that at Superstore (President's Choice brand.) Andrew, I think you'd really like this. It looks like pretty dense chocolate. And only around $5.99 or something.

And now, Ugly Betty commercials. I've never watched this show.

Oh, we're back to ANTM. Why is that girl's hair just like Tootie from Facts of Life? Nigel is mean. Miss Jay's afro reminds me of that Bishi Bashi stage where you have to match the beat to make the guy's hair grow. Nigel is annoying and can't take a joke. Tyra is getting really weird as the seasons go on.

I'm so sick of the "X of you stand before me... but I only have X-1 photos" and the "The first name that I'm going to call is..." JUST CALL THE NAME. No need for the ridiculous drama. Oh, Tootie made it. They're off to Beijing (currently they are in Shanghai.) Oh, the name Tyra doesn't call must leave the show. No, it's the person whose name she doesn't call. Tyra is horrible.

You shouldn't be late for go-sees. Neither should you wander around Shanghai by yourself. Apparently you also must wipe away your sarcastic attitude in order to make the judges like you. I obviously would never make it on this show... and I'm not just talking looks.

And now the hubby wants to play video games, so it's back to work for me.

Mexico roundup, part 1 (sans photos)

Good day everyone,

I'm sure you've been wondering where I've been. Well, to give you an idea of my week thus far, I got home around 8 on Monday and it's just been getting later every day. We're gearing up for three super busy weeks, so I don't think I'll be seeing any less of my messy office any time soon.

Anyway, Mexico! It was great. The weather was perfect - hot, but not ridiculously so. It was our first time at an all-inclusive and I think it was a great way to start. Our resort wasn't one of the huge ones we saw driving past Cancun, but the size was great. We were right by the pool and a tiny walk away from the beach. Apparently at some resorts you might walk for 20 minutes to get to dinner. That is just ridiculous. The food was pretty good, although I think cruise food is a notch above. Food was certainly plentiful. I like how on a cruise, you get to eat a "fancy" meal every night - whereas at all-inclusives, much of the time, your dinner is a buffet.

I managed to finish three books while lying around on the beach enjoying mojitos and margaritas. I read "The World According to Garp" (very... interesting), "All Over Creation" (hmm... also very interesting), and "The Good Life" (which I did not realize was a 9/11-related book.) The hubby couldn't really see the fascination in reading all day long, so he played beach volleyball, soccer, tennis, etc. I did get roped into "beach Olympic games" one day and that was a little strange, but fun. Our team lost though. Maybe because our team name was "Gimme More Tequila" (not my suggestion.)

Anyway I will try to post more when the craziness dies down. Look for me sometime before Christmas, in other words :)

Forgive and forget?

How do you forgive the unforgivable?

This is a question posed by a friend, a woman of great strength and faith in God, who spends much of her life serving others and ministering to their needs ... a woman who has recently suffered a terrible tragedy in her family, one I can't even begin to fathom, grief that would shake your faith more than ever before and would leave you wondering why God could ever allow horrible things to happen.

How does one forgive what is seemingly unforgivable? I don't know the answer. The somewhat obvious answer is that nothing is unforgivable to God. This is a truth I have known for most of my life, and yet I don't know if it is really an answer. God's mercy is beyond what anyone on earth can offer ... so it seems obvious that his ability to forgive goes beyond ours.

What does forgiveness mean?

I wish I had the answers.

I'm giving up NaBloPoMo

...because I realized that being away in Mexico with no free internet will really hamper my posting. So anyway I'll try to keep you all entertained until we leave, and then you'll just have to ponder what I will write next.

So, I'll just answer Tree's comments about popular items in the Operation Christmas Child shoeboxes. I really don't think any item was unpopular, although of course, kids aren't nearly as excited to see socks as they are to see toys. But that doesn't mean socks aren't useful! We found that kids really liked to get toys that had some sort of movement to them - like spinning tops where you pull out a plastic zipper to get them to spin, whirly-bird flyers, yo-yo's, etc. Candy was also a big hit, as you might expect. Older kids seemed to like things that were useful ... sunglasses, hats, small makeup kits for girls (although I am not wild about this...), tools for boys, stickers, hair accessories, notebooks/stationery, pens, etc. I don't think there's much you could put in a box that wouldn't be enjoyed!

Operation Christmas Child/Samaritan's Purse always faces a measure of controversy. I don't pretend to understand it all, but I suppose the short version is that they are often criticized for telling kids about the gospel and about God... many suggest that the shoeboxes come with strings attached because the children are "forced" to hear a religious message in order to get their gift. I see it differently.

OCC works through local partners. Each receiving country has a leadership team, and that leadership team works incredibly hard to mobilize local churches. Often, the pastors of those churches go door-to-door to invite children to come to the church for a rally and for a gift. Children and families are not deceived into attending the event ... they are told that it is a church-organized event. No one is forced to accept Christ. The local pastor and church usually lead worship songs, then someone will tell the Bible story. Kids are asked if they would like to accept Christ as Saviour, and if so, they are invited up for prayer. Then the boxes get handed out. A separate person will have a booklet on Jesus' gift to us available, but kids do not have to take one if they don't want to. They get a box regardless.

Anyway, I think the value of the shoebox goes beyond the gifts inside it. Samaritan's Purse often is able to get into countries with limited access through OCC, and then they are able to do some amazing work. The BioSands water filter is one excellent example. It's a slow sand filtration system which removes harmful bacteria and other water contaminants - one filter can meet an entire family's needs for their lifetime. Pretty amazing stuff. Only $100 supplies a family with the filter and health education, ensuring clean water to cook with, bathe with, etc.

The bottom line, for me, is that SP/OCC seeks to meet the spiritual, emotional, and physical needs of people in developing nations. In so doing, they acknowledge that their main goal is to spread the news of Christ.... but their work isn't conditional upon people accepting Christ.

Hope that helps :)

Shoebox time!

What are you putting in your shoebox this year? Yes that's right, it's Operation Christmas Child time again! If you haven't packed your box yet, it isn't too late! Official collection week is November 5-10, 2007. You can drop off your box at any Safeway, or go here to find a location near you for dropoff.

We just did a little shoebox shopping today. I made my box for a 6-8 year old girl. Here's what I got:

1. Plastic box (more long-lasting than cardboard)
2. Plushie seal (cuz in Canada - we have seals. Heh.)
3. 12 pencil crayons
4. 6 pencils
5. 1 pencil sharpener (hand crank kind!) (only $2!)
6. Skipping rope
7. Facecloth
8. Pink pencil case with ruler/stencil
9. 3 finger puppets (zebra, lion, bear... oh my)
10. Wooden drum toy thing (you rub it between your hands - it makes noise)

Not bad I think. The box wouldn't hold any more stuff!

Hubby made his box for a 10-14 year old boy. He wanted to include some stuff that might help a boy who needs to work, so his box has:

1. Plastic box
2. Screwdriver with various bits
3. Monkey wrench
4. Ruler set
5. 12 pencil crayons
6. 6 pencils
7. Pencil sharpener
8. Magnifying glass (to start a fire? examine a bug?)
9. Othello game
10. Facecloth
11. Tape measure (metal kind)

Maybe that'll give you some ideas for your own shoebox! We're also including a Christmas card with our picture and address, in case somehow the kids are able to write us a letter. That'd be super cool!

We really had so much fun and joy in giving away boxes last year in Chile. God has given us so much... it was awesome to be able to share some of that with children in another part of our world. As we approach the Christmas season, may God work in all of our hearts to look beyond ourselves!

Ridiculous behaviour

Yesterday I spent an unreasonable amount of time on the phone with my former cell phone company, whose name rhymes with Hell. This cell phone saga is just out of control. Although I had cancelled my services with them at the end of September by switching to another company, they decided to bill me all the way until Nov. 21 anyway. Prior to switching, I had phoned to ask if there were any cancellation charges, fees, or penalties I should be aware of, and had been told that no, all you do is get the other company to port your number over and then byebye! After I made the switch, I phoned again to ask if there would be any further charges or problems, and they said no, and byebye.

I did get a bill in which I paid up till Oct 21 (since the billing is always a month in advance), and as it isn't a huge amount, I figured it wasn't worth my time to complain.

But then I got another bill for the following month!

So I phoned and spoke to a rep who really had no idea what I was even saying. She told me that there is a 30 day notice which I must give when I am cancelling. I pointed out that two separate reps hadn't told me about this when I called, and she said, "Sorry, but they were wrong." So I asked to speak to a supervisor, and she took this to mean that she should be the go-between between the supervisor and me. Finally, she told me that the supervisor said because I wasn't on a contract, I didn't have to give the 30 day notice, so good news, I only had to pay up to the end of October. I pointed out that no, that would mean I wouldn't have to pay past September, so in fact, "Hell" owed me money, not the other way around.

She didn't get it.

She finally sent me over to the supervisor, who then backtracked and said in fact, I do have to give 30 days notice. She said I should have referred to my terms of service agreement (given to me in 2003) and when I explained that I don't have this mysterious agreement, which is why I called way back in September, she agreed that the reps back then should have told me about it. I called her on this, saying that if they were both wrong, why should I pay the price for their mistake. She said "Oh, well all of our reps are different and will say different things." (That's reassuring.) She then got kind of nasty and I actually had to say all of the following:

- Stop. Just stop talking.
- Please stop talking.
- Will you let me finish?
- Please stop talking AND LET ME FINISH.
- Excuse me, I was not finished talking.
- So you told the other rep that I didn't have to give 30 days notice, yet you are telling me I do have to.
- STOP TALKING. LET ME FINISH. I AM TALKING. NOT YOU.

She tried to tell me she was being generous in waiving the early contract cancellation fee. Of course, THERE IS NO SUCH FEE since I was not even on a contract. I pointed this out and she said, "Yes, so the fee has been waived." NO. That is incorrect usage of "waived".

She then tried to tell me she was being generous in waiving the Oct 22-Nov 21 bill ... and I said again, there is no 30 day notice, so that bill is really wrong to begin with.

At the end of the day, I possibly called her a dumbass (not the way to approach conflict, I know... but in the interest of full blog disclosure...) Oh, and I'm getting about $5 back from them.

It's the principle.

But I will admit that sometimes, strict adherence to "principle" just isn't worth the time and effort.

NaBloPoMo strikes again

So I just realized that it's time for the annual NaBloPoMo event again ... the month in which bloggers (some? a few thousand?) attempt to post every single day. Once again, I didn't officially join, but once again, I will attempt to write something every day. I have my doubts about the success of this venture, but we shall see.

Speaking of things that occur every year, I got my hair cut two days ago. I don't have a picture of myself yet... nor do I really want to post one on my blog anyway ... but here is (somewhat) the look I suggested:



The stylist (thank you to Char and Jr for the salon suggestion!) said "Oh ... this style requires hair wax. Do you use hair wax?" and I almost said, "What is hair wax?" Instead, I went with the vague "Oh... not really..." and then I gave her complete control of my hair. I tend to think that's the best idea, since I know nothing about hair. I wouldn't want my clients telling me how to do my job, I suppose.

The best part is that this haircut only cost $25 (although FYI - their prices are going up to $28 starting Dec. 1). I am truly a cheapskate (considering I cut my hair once a year or even less). But not so cheap that I would cut my hair myself... although I thought about it.

It's the day after Halloween. Time to search out some half price candy!

Step off, please

This morning I was reading a blog where the writer was talking about his sadness over his wife's recent miscarriage, and I read through some of the comments. One started with something like "Honey, don't feel bad that you are sad about this..."

I *hate* when strangers start their sentences with "Honey" or "Sweetie". It's irritating and patronizing. As well, it most often accompanies some sort of self-righteous statement. Eg, "Honey, you don't know grief until you lose a parent like I have." Unless you are an 86-year-old woman, or my husband, kindly refrain from referring to me as honey or sweetie or sweetheart. Someone once called me sweetheart on some sort of forum and then implied that I had no idea what I was talking about. This is of course untrue as I always know what I am talking about. Nonetheless, I was irritated.

Maybe I'm just a little tired because I arrived at work when it was still dark. I am not a fan of mornings.

Ok, next topic. PJ asked for a post about the Canucks. Well, I'll be the first to admit that they've stunk it up on more than one occasion this year. I went back to my old posts and saw that my Canucks rant last year was on November 15, 2006, so apparently we are a little ahead of schedule. If there's one thing to say about the Canucks, it's that they never fail to disappoint me at least once every season. Consistency is key.

Oh well! Last time I ranted about them, they actually won a few games. I still have faith. :D Frankly I think they need to put Trevor in instead of benching him in favour of the lackeys. Come ON!

Song lyrics

I have about five radio stations that I rotate between in the morning. One is news-only, one is traffic-only, and the others have music (and annoying morning show filler.) Driving to work can be mind-numbingly boring if I haven't got something to listen to, and it passes the time when I'm stuck in traffic (which you would think I wouldn't be, since I listen to traffic radio!)

Once in a while I hear a familiar song and realize that I never really listened to the lyrics before.... and hmm... those are the lyrics?? I wonder what they mean!

For example, I love the "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss" song by PM Dawn. It feels like the perfect summertime song (except for "Summertime", of course). But here are some lines from the song:

1. Subterranean by design, I wonder what I would find if I met you, let my eyes caress you, until I meet the thought of Missess Princess Who?
2. Careless whisper from a careless man, a neutron dance for a neutron fan;
3. Christina Applegate, you gotta put me on. Guess who's piece of the cake is Jack gone? She broke her wishbone and wished for a sign.I told her whispers in my heart were fine.what did she think she could do?

Um ... neutron dance for a neutron fan? cake is jack gone? missess princess who? Maybe this song is a little like "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" or "Puff the Magic Dragon" ... if you get me.

I'm terrible with lyrics in general though. I would totally lose on The Singing Bee.

More to come when I have more thoughts :)

Wii love to DS

Friends, this blog is coming at you from a MacBook. I sure hope you like it because this computer is expensive. Of course, it isn't MY MacBook, but nonetheless, it's a nice one. If I had the cash to spare, I would consider a MacBook. Then again I would probably only use it for PhotoBooth. Speaking of which, if this is your computer on which I am composing my blog, have you noticed any new pictures on your PhotoBooth lately? Heh...

So it's been a bit of a technology-filled world lately. I got my new cell phone after weeks of waiting, and now I am just waiting for my screwed up bill to come so that I can call and complain. Please, sense my joy. The hubby sold my DS to a friend and due to a sale at our friendly Zellers, I got a brand new white DS Lite. Hubby is the proud owner of a brand new black DS Lite. Ahaha! We are such nerds. We will be Mariokarting all over the place, so look out.

Not much else of note lately. Someone sent us an email about some black Lab puppies that need a new home, and I did think about it - but it wouldn't be fair to the dog since we are going to Mexico soon ... too bad - they were super cute.

I am currently suffering from Nintendo thumb. As well as watery eyes. Perhaps I am just too old to play Nintendo. But probably not.

Pointless post, but I bet you read it all the way through anyway!

In which I make a poor analogy

Some good news at work today led me to visit Starbucks (in celebration, I guess.) The signs at Starbucks, they are convincingly tempting and beautiful. In the greyness of the afternoon, I couldn't help but to order a pumpkin spice latte. Have you seen the picture of this drink? It is delightfully cozy looking, with its foamy, whipped-creamy top, poured nicely into a fall-coloured mug.

If you haven't had this drink before and aren't sure if you will like it, I encourage you to pick something else. Because it is the opposite of good. Oh sure, at first you don't notice the odd aftertaste or the vibrant orange colour of the drink, since it is covered by foam and whipped cream. But then, those things really start to take over and bug you... and the coffee is less and less enjoyable... and then you wonder why you ordered it at all instead of your standard caramel macchiato or dark chocolate mocha (even though that only exists at Blenz.) And then you start to question your own judgment - after all, what fool pays $4 for a drink she doesn't even like?

When you think about it, isn't that just like when you have a crush on someone - you are attracted by the outward good things, but you overlook the not-so-good things (or maybe - you just never knew about them to begin with.) You like that he is attractive, that he is mysterious, that he makes you laugh. Later on, as your crush develops, you discover that the little things you didn't mind so much are really irking you. That neat little way he honked rather than came to your door? The way he never said exactly what he was thinking? The constant finishing of your sentences? All SO IRRITATING. And then you are shocked that you ever liked the person to begin with.

That is, until you find the person who is your dark chocolate mocha on a cold day, the yang to your yin, the right to your left, and all that, and you realize that beneath the foam and whipped cream lies only good things. Right?

I only like diamonds

Diamonds are my birthstone. Had I been born in May, my birthstone would be emerald.

And that is all I know about stones.

Except, today on the morning radio show, the two hosts had a discussion about how stones can be healing and therapeutic, and how one host's mom had given her a topaz to "de-clutter" her mind. They asked for callers who could help explain the power of stones like rose quartz and boy howdy, did callers ever have things to say.

One caller spoke about a stone called snowflake obsidian, which she says is useful for bringing out the truth. She had been in a horrible relationship when she purchased the stone, and a week after she started carrying it around, the horrible truth came out and the relationship ended. Subsequent callers echoed the power of the obsidian, telling of how it too helps to de-clutter a person's mind, although apparently topaz does not ... and then it got even stranger, with callers talking about the negative energy that one might experience if one purchases a stone that has been previously worn. One caller's friend bought some kind of ring that gave her headaches, and as it turned out, the previous owner had also had headaches! (Maybe the ring was just on too tight!)

So then people said that what you might not realize is that you must cleanse a stone before it will work for you. Not clean, but cleanse. One lady suggested taking the stone out at a full moon and burying it in the sand to get rid of the negative energy. She talked about how stones are like sponges and they absorb whatever energy you put out. Someone else said that you obviously would not want to pick any stone, you must let the stone pick you. Yet another person said that the stone should touch your skin in order to work properly.

I admit, I was surprised by the level at which people believe in the power of an inert, inanimate object. Call me crazy, but the girl who was in the crappy relationship needed a stone to tell her it was crappy? And feeling as though a stone has healing powers, or could help "ground" you or clear your mind? I just can't fathom that at all. Perhaps this is an example of how people realize there is something missing in their lives, but instead of reaching for God, they reach for some kind of false spirituality. And then maybe they receive some sort of comfort for whatever reason, and their belief in that object increases even more. I don't know.

But it does suggest to me that we aren't doing enough to spread the good news about our God's love.

Luke 19:37-40
When he came near the place where the road goes down the Mount of Olives, the whole crowd of disciples began joyfully to praise God in loud voices for all the miracles they had seen:
"Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord!"
"Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!"
Some of the Pharisees in the crowd said to Jesus, "Teacher, rebuke your disciples!"
"I tell you," he replied, "if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out."

Let us learn not to keep quiet.

Clutter

If you've been to our house before and you're a neat freak, thank you for not commenting on the constant disarray of our living space. I am definitely not a neat freak, but even I find the mess a little overwhelming at times. The difficulty is that there always seems to be something else to do rather than clean. We like to have people over and that definitely doesn't help with the need to clean - more people, more mess.

But it's fall, and I think a good time to get the house into good shape for winter. My goal is to get the hubby to start finding better places for all of his sports gear. Yesterday I said to him that I seem to have hardly anything in the house - everywhere I look it's hockey stuff, or golf stuff, or computer or work-related stuff that isn't mine. Even the storage in our bedroom is uneven - I get 5 drawers, he has 6, I get slightly less than half the closet (it's not clothes that take up his side - it's STUFF.) While I don't claim to be terribly organized, I do think that I tend toward getting rid of stuff rather than being a pack rat (like my brother - hello Andrew!) The only thing I've held onto with no real idea as to its future is my wedding dress. The hubby, however, is more of a collector and so we have some work to do in de-collecting.

In one effort to get myself going re: housework, I bought a laundry basket. You might not know this, but our hamper is actually a drink cooler in the shape of R2D2. It's quirky, but not that practical for laundry. It wasn't my choice for a hamper. Over the years, I've slowly taken over laundry in this house. The hubby is now prohibited from doing any laundry that involves my clothes... I got tired of pulling things out of the dryer that really shouldn't have gone in. I also felt like a nag every time I said that jeans HAD to be turned inside out before washing, and, well, I'll stop now before my laundry-related OCD comes out. So anyway, new laundry basket! It's been a great addition because now I can transport clothing without rolling R2D2 all over the place. R2D2 is probably a little jealous since he doesn't get to move around much any more. What he doesn't know is that there is a whole other R2D2 sitting in another bedroom, waiting to take over as laundry hamper #2. Did I mention how boys are weird?

I had a discussion with some teens once about laundry - in particular, the sock/underwear drawer. Some of them were of the type who throw everything into the drawer without any folding or sock-matching. Ridiculous! Even though I basically own 12 pairs of the exact same sock, I always match them up (and roll them up) before they go in the drawer. And underwear is ALWAYS folded.

So if I tell you I have to organize my sock drawer rather than going out, at least you know I'm not avoiding you - I'm just being domestic!

Dark clouds

I've been in a bit of a funk lately because of all of the stuff that keeps happening. We had to have the hubby's family dog put down and that has really been upsetting, not least because of the impact on the hubby and his family, and the very sad feeling I get when we go over there and May-May isn't there to greet us. She was a great dog. I guess we just have to remember the good times - like when she stayed with us and curled up at my feet to sleep (after frantically searching the house for the hubby, who was out) ... anyway. I miss her.

Work has been a bundle of irritations and office politics. It's hard to focus sometimes and I find that my temper is always right under the surface, waiting to explode. I'm not a terribly gentle person sometimes and I wish I was nicer. I don't know if that can change or if I just need to adjust my attitude somewhat. I think (and hope) that underneath my irritability lies a compassionate person. Of course, I may just be fooling myself.

My cell phone died a painful death two Saturdays ago. It was kind enough to display a little tombstone with "RIP - Re-Initiate Phone" written next to a tiny cell phone. I can't tell you how thrilled I was that the software programmers for my phone were so creative.

Anyway, the hubby ordered me a new cell phone with new, fabulous cell phone plan he negotiated last week. The cell phone folks promised 3-5 business days for said phone to arrive, and yesterday (6th business day) we were informed that it had not been sent out yet. I am not glued to a cell phone like some folks are, but I do like to have one handy in case of emergencies, and to be able to call when I am late, traffic is crappy, or I have made an unexpected detour. As well, I like to be able to call people when I feel like it. So as you can imagine, I am a little ticked that my new phone has not yet arrived and probably will not for several more days. Adding insult to injury, I am still being charged for a cell phone plan I cannot use, since my phone informed me of its death. I could have walked into a store and purchased a phone by now, but did not because of aforementioned new, fabulous cell phone plan. Given that it hasn't even been activated yet, I am in cell phone limbo and it is an unhappy place.

*note: coincidentally, I just answered a call at work from some folks at my soon-to-be cell phone provider offering us some glitzy plan. I considered asking the guy to send me my phone already dang you but decided to just forego it and tell him we weren't interested. He can, and I quote, definitely understand where we're coming from. Can he really? I think not.

Also, I am still in summer mode, but the weather is uncooperative. I hate all forms of winter.

I'm going to go and eat a bowl of noodles. Surely some comfort food will improve my mood.

How deep the Father's love for us

We went to the funeral service for Josh today. Most of you probably know already, but the reason we went is because the hubby used to work with Josh's dad. This whole event has hit me rather hard. I didn't know the family very well at all, so I think it is just knowing that they are suffering which hurts me the most. What do you say, what do you do to comfort someone who might be beyond despair, beyond hope? How can you reconcile a good and loving God with a tragedy where a little boy is so suddenly gone from this world?

The service was beautifully done. The pastor spoke about how Jesus called the little children to him, and how God called Josh home early to be with him. I believe he is in heaven, but is that enough for a family that has lost their son and brother? It doesn't take away the pain. From what everyone shared about him, he was a little boy who loved to run and play and ride his bike ... he was a caring person who always made sure that the boy in his class who needed help received help ... he was a good big brother to his sisters, and he loved his parents tremendously.

In all of this, I just can't say any more than that I know our Lord hears us when we cry, and that he will comfort those who are suffering. I know so because I've lost loved ones... but I cannot even imagine the pain of losing a child.... and so I can only place my faith in God again and his promise to carry us through to the end of this long, difficult walk of life.

Please keep praying for Josh's family. May our God draw them close.

From a song by Michael Olson:

And so we wait in joyful hope
For You to come and take us home
And so we join beneath the cross
And suffering from whence we go
The greatest act of sovereign grace
In the universe displayed
For everything must die to rise again

On the third day, behold the King
On the third day, death has no sting
On the third day, we're forgiven and reconciled

What a girl wants

I was going to write a blog about relationships, and what I think girls want out of relationships, and then I wrote it about three times and was dissatisfied, so it has now turned into a totally different post. You see, although I am married, I am most definitely not a relationship guru. I do, however, listen to a morning radio show where frequently one of the hosts talks about the latest (ridiculous) relationship guru book that s/he just read. Maybe one day I'll blog about that.

No, instead, today I'll tell you about the day I recently spent in court. That's right, I said day. For a matter that was to last 20 minutes. You can imagine my delight. I won't bore you with the details, but let's just say that it's worth it to develop a coherent argument that flows rather than to speak completely off the cuff. Just a little tip. What I want to share is my biggest lesson of the day - good shoes are completely worth the money.

I am typically a very cheap person when it comes to clothing and shoes. It's not uncommon for me to reject an item if it costs more than $20. You know it's bad when you get excited about cheap clothing at the grocery store. I once bought shoes for $8 at Payless, and they were great ... to look at. Of course, you get what you pay for most of the time.

So when I was in the States in the summer, I decided I was going to buy myself a comfortable pair of dressy flats for court, and that I was not going to let price stop me from making a good purchase. I went to the fabulous Nordstrom Rack and spent literally hours looking at the shoes. And I ended up with these (in black patent)!
You're probably thinking that these aren't very flat. So true! But aren't they LOVELY?? The best part is that they are leather with leather soles, and despite the 3" heels, I wore them all day and my feet were fine. I spent $50 US, which is kinda tough for me, honestly ... but leather! with leather soles!

I spent much of my day admiring my shoes ... I mean, when you're spending your entire day listening to ridiculous argument, you may as well ogle your own footwear!

Where is God when it hurts?

Pray for Josh Bates' family as they deal with the loss of a young, energetic brother and son. In the midst of darkness, may God use us to be light and comfort.

Lord, I don't know why this happened or even what good could come from this. I think we're all at a loss. I know you are sovereign, I know you are in control. God, please bring hope to Josh's family, to all of us who wonder why.

America is awesome.

Poor AC Slater - he must have been killing himself not to laugh.

Summer's end

Before I begin, I'd like to praise the highway authorities for putting in a very nice overpass and shaving five minutes off my commute. Now if only they could arrange for me to just beam myself to work.

I'm not sure if I've ever spoken about the show Intervention before (probably I have) ... I catch it sometimes on A&E and it's very powerful. Generally it's about someone who is suffering from a terrible addiction or abuse problem, whether it's some kind of substance, or an eating disorder, etc, and then a group of friends and family get together to stage an intervention. I probably didn't need to explain that, but anyway. It's incredibly sad to see how someone's life can turn from a young kid with tons of potential to an adult who has completely lost control. By the time they get on the show (I believe usually they are told that it is a documentary about addiction; they don't know an intervention is coming), the family and friends have become desperate.

I don't really know what it is that I like about the show. Maybe it's the raw human emotion, the reality of addiction, the fact that it's like a train wreck and I can't turn away. Maybe it's that the show confronts stereotypes - the person who is a drug addict is someone's daughter or father or brother, someone who was at one time a good student, who held a steady job, who grew up with a loving family. Or maybe it's that I just can't understand why someone who needs help so badly would reject the help that is offered to them.

Maybe the desperation that the family feels when their loved one rejects rehab is a little like how God feels when we turn away from him, or when we think we can do it all on our own and leave him out of our lives. It's easy to fall into that trap, and it's difficult to remain on the path God intends.

From Romans 5:16-17:
Again, the gift of God is not like the result of the one man's sin: The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification. For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God's abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ.

Once more, with feeling

It's my mom's birthday today (happy birthday Mom!) and so I thought I'd write a little ode to my mom instead of the usual rant that appears on this website.

My mom has been a mother filled with strength and courage since the day I was born. Well really, I should say she's been that since my brother was born, since I was an easy baby and he was not. (hi there big brother!) (I am also the smart one!) Times weren't always easy for our family, but my parents never wavered in their faith in God, nor in their love for us. I remember many good times spent with my mom. When I was little and my brother was in school, my mom would take me to the mall, where I would always get to have a "triangle" (a piece of cake covered in chocolate - it was triangle-shaped). When we were older, she would take us to the library so we could each borrow an armful of books. For at least ten years of my life, she drove me to piano lessons every week, at least 45 minutes each way. Sometimes, my teacher would yell at me, and my mom would later say that I should have practiced more, or stopped fooling around during my practice time - I'm glad she never just blindly told me I was doing fine. Or she would tell me that if I didn't like piano, I should quit - meaning that I always had the choice to go on or not. I remember lots of late night chats and laughter in the house, and watching soap operas and reality TV together. No Chinese TV in our house!

Of course, it can't have been simple to be my mother. I wasn't terribly rebellious, but I wasn't the perfect child either. And after God called my dad home, my mom had even more to do, and even less time to herself. Yet she never turned against God for her lot in life. Instead, she taught me through her life that God gives, and God takes away, and yet he is always faithful. She showed me how to put God first, and how to appreciate the abundant life that God offers us. My mom is a woman after God's own heart, and I hope that one day, someone will say that about me too.

Thanks for being a great mom, Mom! Maybe one day I'll have a daughter as cool as your daughter is. Hahaha! Just kidding.

Remember to be good to your parents!

August

One of my pet peeves is know-it-allness. I can't stand a know-it-all who brags about knowing it all. Here's an example: someone asks me if I'm enjoying married life. I say yes, I am rather enjoying it, thanks for asking, although life has been quite busy. Said person then says, why just wait until you have kids! Then you'll really be feeling busy. You don't even know what busy is yet! ... Seriously - how annoying!

(I try my best not to be one of those "I've done it all, you have no idea" people so if I have been like that toward you, I heartily apologize.)

I had more of a rant written, but perhaps I should move on.

Last week, I was driving from far off lands over a bridge and noticed a number of signs on the bridge saying RAMPS ARE SAFE. PROCEED AT POSTED SPEED LIMIT. I don't know about you, but when there is a huge sign saying the ramps are safe, my first thought is that they are unsafe. Apparently everyone else thought so too, because everyone slowed down to go over the ramp (which was really more like a bump.)

Traffic issues interest me because of my long commute. There is a portion of my commute that I dislike tremendously because it is slow and painful. There is a shortcut, but lots of construction along the shortcut lately. Finally, the city has listened to my unspoken pleas for relief and they have been building an overpass to get over the slow part of my commute. Every day, I drive by to see if the overpass is ready yet. Of course, only today did I think to google it and looks like it won't be ready until October. Ugh. Don't they realize it could shave off 5-10 minutes of my commute every day? In billable hours, that's like what, $50? (PJ, I threw that one in for you!)

It's almost the long weekend and I can't wait. Maybe I'll clean the house! Woohoo!

Snippy much?

Those who know me will know I have a bad temper. I keep it in check as much as possible, particularly at work where being angry is counterproductive. But sometimes (okay - all the time) I find myself asking why someone is being so monumentally stupid, or why someone else just does not get it, or why it feels like the world is out to make me irritated. Of course, the problem is me, not everyone else. I'm just the one trying to force my version of being rational on them.

Anyway let's move on. Today I went to the Kwik-E-Mart to see what Simpsons gear I could snag. I managed to get a couple of donuts with the pink icing and sprinkles, and a box of Krusty-O's. We haven't decided whether we'll eat the Krusty-O's or not. They are apparently frosted. I bet they are just like frosted Cheerios. The Kwik-E-Mart was just okay, like my brother said. Probably not worth a long trek. I wanted to try the blue vanilla squishie, but the lineup was too long.

On another note, if you liked someone, would you make a move of any sort? I'm always surprised by the girls who say No. But then again, I am rather practical, not that emotionally driven (anymore.) I suppose fear of rejection is an issue. Or maybe the guy just isn't that into you. I've really gotta read that book.

Now I am just rambling, a sure sign it's time for bed.

Woo! Democrats rule!

Hello all!

Yes, I am coming from that land, PJ, and no, the hubs isn't with me.... it would be rude of me to complain about travelling alone if he were here!

It's been a long, long day. Conference all day long, then the opening reception where a rock band from the 70s played. It was pretty cool and also incredibly loud, so I left a little early. Before that band came on (I'll let you all guess who it was a little later) there were some speeches and some politicians who wanted to thank the organization for raising funds for the recent Congress elections. This organization is very strongly Democrat-oriented, and rightly so, since it sure ain't the Republicans who are gonna stand up for rights to the justice system.

This weekend has highlighted for me a lot of the differences between Canada and the US. For one thing, in the US, the jury selection process is much more complicated than in Canada. In a voir dire (the southern accent pronounces it "vor die-er") the lawyers get to ask the potential jury members extensive questions, and find out about their backgrounds, etc. Then they get several peremptory challenges (where you don't have to give any reason for deselecting someone) and several challenges without cause. In Canada, you find out the most basic of information (name, occupation) and I don't think you get to ask them anything - and then you get some challenges.

Some things are the same between countries though, like the tort reform movement (better named the tort deform movement.) Corporations push tort reform with catch phrases like "Litigation is too expensive!" and "Get rid of the frivolous lawsuits!" Tort reform movements in our own province include the campaigns for no-fault auto insurance. I can't emphasize enough how unfair no-fault insurance can be. In some provinces, if your injury was determined to be "minor", despite whatever consequences may have befallen you, you would be limited to recover $2000 or less. Without a true tort system like we have, you wouldn't be able to turn to the courts for justice.

Sometimes I wonder why I chose to be a lawyer and why God allows me to continue being a lawyer even when I feel like I know nothing at all. But other days, I realize that what I get to do is help people who, in a different province or country, would have no legal right whatsoever... and, if we are complacent, might not have legal rights in the future. It's worth standing up for.

Really should pay more attention

A week or two ago, I was telling some friends how I frequently get asked vague, legal questions by family, friends, and acquaintances and how it sometimes amuses me that I'm expected to know the answer to every legal question out there. The questions are all on different topics and on the odd occasion, I actually have an answer.... but often I'm left wondering whether I have totally let that person down by my lack of knowledge, or whether I have missed the real point of the question by focusing on one narrow legal issue rather than the big picture.

I recently found something out that made me realize sometimes people ask questions with long, complicated hypothetical scenarios, but the truth is somewhere buried within the abstract... possibly intentionally buried, for me to discover. It made me feel like an idiot not to have figured out the situation earlier on, having been so focused on the legal problem and having missed the person completely. I used to think I was a good listener, but I'm not so sure any more. It's so hard to interpret the feelings behind a statement, the personal problem behind the stated legal problem. Of course, law school trained me to think about the issue, the ratio, the analysis, the conclusion (gah!) - but what about the person ... the family ... the emotions?

I've got a lot to learn in life.

Seven hundred and thirty days

Guess what folks - it's anniversary time again. Another year, another cake to be enjoyed, another day in our life together. This last year has been a busy one for us. Let's see - I became a lawyer, participated in a couple of trials, hubby decided to try out a new career field, he also became an elder, we got to be sponsors together again, we went to California twice, we went to Chile on our first missions trip together ... and of course, we made it through a year without sweating the small stuff. I'd call that successful, but I'd give all the credit to our God, our most faithful Father, who comforts and who motivates us to stick it out.

Here's to another fantastic year!

To paraphrase a little song I may have helped compose... "We're married... open bar!"